The exception being that last spring I was contacted by the son, “Rob,” I gave up for adoption nearly 20 years ago. Ugly Truth to Birth Son?: I’m a very successful businesswoman but came from a truly “hard knocks” background, which I usually don’t try to hide. Re: Teen Sex: The Victorian era called, and it wants its neighbor back.Ī: Perhaps we malign the Victorians to assume they would be this nuts! The impression I got from many people I dealt with in this process was that to many of these professionals there is no such thing as acceptable or normal “playing doctor,” except the counselor whom my daughter ended up seeing and who helped our family move through all of this. I had been speaking to my daughter frequently about sexual assault when she mentioned the incident with her brother to her friend, because a friend’s daughter had been raped by a coach. So I would caution parents who speak to children, as they should, about abuse that they mention that there are some developmentally normal situations during that these things can occur. After the investigation, the entire case was dropped, but the entire process was one of the most stressful experiences of my entire life, made more so by that fact that you cannot talk to anyone about it. In addition my daughter had to undergo a forensic interview with a child psychologist my son had to give an audio recorded statement to the police. An investigation ensued that involved two home visits and interviews with my children. The department of child and family services was called. The mother then mentioned it to the school principal, a mandated reporter. This friend, appropriately so I guess, told her mother. My children would have been approximately ages 6 and 4 (we never were able to determine this exactly they may have been slightly older or younger) when it happened-there was some showing of parts to each other. Last year my family went through hell when my daughter mentioned playing doctor with her older brother to a friend. Today these sorts of things are taken EXTREMELY seriously. Re: Playing Doctor: I would add this word of caution. My question is do I keep this secret to myself forever, or is there any good reason to share this with him? I am confident we are partners for life, and I would never want to do anything to jeopardize our relationship or the trust that we have. If he found out, I believe our trust would be shattered and he would inevitably wonder if I didn’t tell him this, what else must I be hiding? The answer is nothing. Now I feel guilty and conflicted about having this secret. If the same thing happened now-or even several months into our relationship-he would have been the first person I told. Fast-forward four years-we’re married and this man has shown to be the most honest and trustworthy person I have ever met. I thought telling him about the pregnancy would freak him out and our relationship would end. That said, I didn’t tell him and terminated the pregnancy. We had already discussed very early on that neither of us wanted kids, so I was sure of his feelings about the matter. I was on birth control, and we had just stopped using condoms that week. Belated Moral Dilemma: Several years ago when I was dating, I met someone and accidentally became pregnant one month after we met. Should I turn them in or just turn a blind eye to it? I was absolutely appalled by this and wonder if I can still be friends with these people or if I should call the police, since both of these kids are underage (both 16). When I asked her why she allowed this, she said she’d rather they be in a safe, comfortable place and have protection than to be sneaking around in parked cars and such. I brought this to the mother’s attention, and she said she knew about it but would tell them to be quiet. I also heard what sounded like loud sex going on in the room on the other side of my home office wall.
I’ve been home due to recovering from surgery, and one afternoon after school, I saw the daughter and her boyfriend go into the condo when the mother wasn’t there. This family and I have been friends for a long time, and we get along well and have never had any problems. Neighbor’s Teenage Daughter Has Boyfriend Over: I live in a condo next door to a widow with a 16-year-old daughter.
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